The Graveyard Girl and the Boneyard Boy, on #LisaBurtonRadio

Super spooky new paranormal radio interview featuring The Graveyard Girl and the Boneyard Boy courtesy of Lisa Burton the robot girl on Entertaining Stories!

Entertaining Stories

Lisa Burton

Hello, and welcome to another edition of Lisa Burton Radio, the only show that brings you the characters from the books you love. I’m your host, Lisa the robot girl, and today we’re going to talk about Craig’s new book–. Hold that thought, we have an early caller.

“Hello, caller. You’re on the air with Lisa. What’s on your mind, honey?”

“Oh, hey… I’m on? This is live? Wow, this is so cool — I love Craig’s books — wait, is he there? Probably busy, right? That’s okay, I love girls and robots, too. I mean robot girls. Uh, I guess I’m trying to say I’m a big fan… Anyway, I’m Drake Stevenson. I’ve been wanting to call in for a while — long time listener and all. I guess I’m calling tonight because I have this weird problem. It’s kind of a girl problem…uh…wow, that sounded so lame…”

“That’s…

View original post 1,536 more words

Look out! The (celestial) Dog days are here…

… but first a WARNING!

TURN THE VOLUME DOWN A BIT!

I’m a Dog! It’s my Chinese Zodiac sign, which as you probably know is the Sign for 2018 as well. What you may not know, is that each 12 years the element of the Zodiac animal sign changes as well. In my birth year, 1958, it was the Earth Dog, and because there’s a 60 year cycle to that elemental rotation, 2018 is also an Earth Dog year!

… I’m hoping that means this is going to be a great one for me!

Here’s what may be in store for us from the start of the Chinese New Year today…

Mark your turf—but play well with others.

Dog years can make everyone a lot more territorial, and having a safe haven to call our own is a must in 2018. Home sales (and prices) will continue to trend up in many markets—and, by extension, so will the popularity of shelter blogs, home decor shows and Instagram interior decorators. With the earth element ruling in 2018, go green with your selections. Now’s the time for owners to invest in renewable energy solutions like solar and wind. Planting gardens and trees can also cleanse the air while improving curb appeal.

“Insta-BFFs and Facebook faux-friending will go the way of the dinosaur in 2018. As anyone who has unleashed their pet at a dog park can attest, canines have a systematic getting-to-know-you process.”

With xenophobia on a continued rise, however, this border patrolling can be a double-edged sword. As protective pups bark at any random who crosses our property line, we can also grow unnecessarily suspicious of our good-willed neighbors. The challenge in 2018 will be setting healthy boundaries without erecting immovable walls. That said, the world can be a dangerous place and the question remains: How on-guard do we legit need to be? The Dog has an idea: Put people through the sniff test before allowing them into your pack. Insta-BFFs and Facebook faux-friending will go the way of the dinosaur in 2018. As anyone who has unleashed their pet at a dog park can attest, canines have a systematic getting-to-know-you process. Before they romp and play, they bark at each other, growl and, yes, get a whiff of each other’s most private parts.

Metaphorically, the Year of the Earth Dog requires a similar meet- and-greet strategy. Can we open up and show our most vulnerable sides to each other? That level of transparency could be considered crass, but in 2018, being “too real” can be a huge trust-builder. It’s kind of like the children’s book Everyone Poops, which was written with the intent of normalizing a bodily function that’s considered rather embarrassing— unless, of course, you’re a dog. This creature’s excretory habits are the most publicly observed and accepted. While we’re not suggesting you cop a squat on a city sidewalk, 2018 is the year for people to get honest and stop acting like their s**t don’t stink.

Keep calm and canine on.

More than almost any other emotion, dogs have a keen ability to sense fear. And during the Year of the Earth Dog, we can be easily riled, especially in the face of uncertainty. Politicians, bullies, and even trusted media sources that rely on clicks for revenue, can rile up the fear factor. A sanity saver? Create a grounding practice that utilizes the earth element. This can be as basic as a 30-minute morning walk or leaning against a tall tree for its stalwart support.

Dial down angst-inducing stimulants like caffeine and sugar, and reach for natural snacks like raw nuts, apple wedges and healthy proteins. Turn off news alerts and only check world events at set times so you aren’t sent into a panic spiral every time a “breaking headline” posts. Bring this digital detox to your bedroom and invest in a legit alarm clock instead of sleeping with your mobile phone on your nightstand.

Alpha males and tough bitches.

As the Year of the Fire Cock turns over to the Year of the Earth Dog, will we see more Alpha male antics? Ugh, we’re afraid so. We have one more year of law and order ideology and scary dog-whistling politics to weather before the hedonistic Earth Boar shakes it up in 2019.

But 2018 comes with a warning label: Don’t mess with the bitches! The Dog is associated with Western astrology’s Libra, the sign of equality and justice. The age-old, imbalanced power dynamics between men and women will continue to raise hackles in 2018. Domineering types who use their stature to intimidate, control and abuse the pack could be locked out of the doghouse (and perhaps penned up in the Big House). The feminist revolution of 2018 might even reclaim the word “bitch” (perhaps bedazzled on a choker) as the upleveled pussy hat. Designers, you heard it here first.

© astrostyle.com

I’m off to celebrate with a BBQ Beef and noodles stir-fry …

Happy Earth Dog New Year to YOU!

Weirdly great Valentine’s Day…

 

… well, the nature of lurve is different for all of us after all. Whether or not you exist in the ‘real’ world or one some other plane of existence!
While he was still with us, my husband and I had variable levels of Valentine’s activity, running from barely there to really touching romantic dinners. The most memorable of those was when I had my definitive breakdown in 2005 (at the Springer Spaniel gastro-pub – a favourite night out treat for me still) when he gave me a rather lovely pink pearl bracelet watch and reduced me to mushy tears.

This year, of course the only Valentine’s gift I’m getting is the one I’m giving myself, which is minimal, no hassle online time and an easy to cook sirloin steak with peppercorn sauce, asparagus and mange tout. This will inevitably be followed by millionaire’s shortbread with Haagen-Daz, a frozen Strawberry Daiquiri with some Swiss truffles, then I’ll most likely wind up watching the latest Tattoo Fixers Valentine’s Special – I’m obsessed with Sketch! 😛 

Tolkienesque dragons are much on my mind these days as the WIP is coming back into focus. Maybe next Valentine’s day I’ll have a couple done on my arms if I continue to lose weight/change body shape – so there’ll be something nicer to look at than saggy skin! 😛

And just to gross you out completely… here’s a suitably weird romantic skit from Family Guy (the one where Peter gets erotically harassed by his lady boss, Angela)!

Enjoy! ❤

 

Big Bang Comedy, and the Shattered Windscreen of the Internet

Deep stuff from Tara S… Need to think of an equally cerebral response now. I may be gone some time… 😛

Tara Sparling writes

I was reading an article in the New York Times the other day about niche comedy. It spoke of a drummer telling jokes about drumming to other drummers, and reminded me of a friend at university who studied maths once telling me about mathematical jokes, which made no sense to non-mathy people.

The joke was something about mathematicians not being able to tell the difference between Christmas and Hallowe’en, because Dec 25 is Oct 31. I did not laugh, because regardless of my deep abiding love for statistics, I am not a complete nerd. To be fair, he didn’t laugh either, but this was because as well as a mathematician, he was a normal human being with a functioning sense of humour.

Anyway, I think the joke had something to do with computers. This did not mean it had something to do with social media, but as we all know by now, I…

View original post 780 more words

LIZZIE CHANTREE – Ninja School Mum Launch (Part 2)

Another outlet for Lizzie Chantree’s new book, Ninja School Mum!

Jan Hawke INKorporated

Today it’s my great pleasure to participate for the second time in Lizzie Chantree’s new book launch, which is now available on Amazon. Ninja School Mum is Lizzie’s fourth contemporary-romance and, in common with her previous books, is full of vibrant, quirky characters and situations. So, without further ado, let’s get all the lowdown on this little gem of a story…


Book blurb:

Obsessive-compulsive school mum, Skye, is a lonely elite spy, who is running from her past whilst trying to protect the future of her child. She tries hard to fit in with the other parents at her son’s new school, but the only person who accepts her unconventional way of life is new mother, Thea.

Thea is feeling harassed by her sister and bored with her life, but she suspects that there is something strange about the new school mum, Skye. Thea has secrets of her own and, although…

View original post 794 more words

Sir Chocolate stops by #LisaBurtonRadio

Well… I couldn’t pass up on this one, could I? 😛 Aside from it being for kids of all ages, the subject matter is very close to my heart (the fantasy elements AND the chocolate of course)! 😉
Nice to see it’s a mother and son team as well 🙂

Entertaining Stories

Lisa Burton

Hey there all you conquistadores and knights in shining armor. Today is Thursday, and you know what that means. It’s time for Lisa Burton Radio. I’m your host, Lisa the robot girl, bringing you another fabulous interview with one of the characters you love from your favorite books. My guest today is Sir Chocolate. “Welcome to the show, um, Sir.”

“Thank you, Lisa, I am delighted to be here. You don’t mind if I try up the air conditioning, do you? It is a bit warm in here and I don’t want to start melting.”

“I’m kind of indifferent to temperatures, so help yourself. I understand you’ve taken up a quest, as knights often do. Can you tell our listeners what kind of challenge you’re facing?”

“Lady Sweet and I own a chocolate factory where we make chocolate goodies, sugar mice and other sugar decorations that we sell in our…

View original post 1,172 more words

Why Competitive Travelling Is The New World Sport

Jan the Hawke re-blogging as SIan the Bard… I prefer travelling in fantasy realms, the itineraries are a lot more flexible, it’s a lot cheaper and the scenery is hoopier as it’s self-generated! 😛

Tara Sparling writes

Why Competitive Travelling Is The New World Sport

The following conversation is a thinly exaggerated account of an actual conversation I heard, loudly expressed, on the TransSiberian train last November.

Traveller 1: So we just came from [Cool Place of The Moment #7] and we’re headed for [Place So Cool It’s Not Even A Hashtag Yet]. Where are you guys travelling to?

Traveller 2: Well, we started in [Ridiculously Remote Place Which Nobody Ever Enjoyed Themselves In Ever] 17 months ago, and we’re making our way to [Lonely Planet’s #1 Destination As Announced Last Week] by Christmas. On foot.

Traveller 1: [chastened] Wow, that’s such a cool way to travel, on foot. [more smugly] You’re gonna love [Lonely Planet’s #1 Destination As Announced Last Week]. I was there last year and it was such an incredible spot. There was hardly anyone there back then. I hope it’s not too busy these days after the Lonely…

View original post 884 more words

LIZZIE CHANTREE – Ninja School Mum Launch

Spreading the lurve for Lizzie from INKorporated!

 

Jan Hawke INKorporated

Today it’s my great pleasure to participate in Lizzie Chantree’s new book launch, which is now on pre-order with Amazon. Ninja School Mum is Lizzie’s fourth contemporary-romance and, in common with her previous books, is full of vibrant, quirky characters and situations. So, without further ado, let’s get all the lowdown on this little gem of a story…


Book blurb:

Obsessive-compulsive school mum, Skye, is a lonely elite spy, who is running from her past whilst trying to protect the future of her child. She tries hard to fit in with the other parents at her son’s new school, but the only person who accepts her unconventional way of life is new mother, Thea.

Thea is feeling harassed by her sister and bored with her life, but she suspects that there is something strange about the new school mum, Skye. Thea has secrets of her own and, although the two become…

View original post 663 more words

Book Launch – The Hat by Craig Boyack – Lisa Burton Visits

Can’t wait to start my copy of The Hat – maybe this evening! 😀

Fiction Favorites

I want to welcome Lisa Burton, Craig Boyack’s personal assistant to Fiction Favorites. She is here to tell you about Craig’s latest book. As you may know, I love Craig’s work and can highly recommend his writing.  It is always a pleasure to have her join me here on the coast. Hi, Lisa.

Craig and Lisa

Hi, and thanks for having me over again, John. I love getting away from the cabin and promoting Craig’s books on occasion. It’s a long old winter out there, you know? (I know Lisa especially in the company of Craig)

Today, we’re touring around a novella called The Hat. This one is about a girl, Lizzie, who works hard to overcome the trials of everyday life. She winds up with an old hat that belonged to her grandfather, only this is no ordinary hat. It’s a being from another dimension, trapped in the shape of a…

View original post 504 more words

It’s the BEFOULED trailer party day – on the penultimate day of 2017…

… which means I forgot that December has 31 days! 😛 Never mind – I’ve the perfect background music-video for us to listen to for this, and any other year.

Lest we forget, whatever may happen, for good or ill – here’s Satchmo to remind us that it’s ALWAYS 

‘A Wonderful World!’

 

And – without further ado,

WELCOME to the

So what’s a book trailer? Well, it’s kind of like a movie promo trailer – and they can help you let the world know what sort of book you’ve unleashed!

So, no messing – here’s the link to the party venue…

CLICK THE YOUTUBE LOGO ABOVE OR THIS TO GO TO 

the YouTube page…

… and then leave a comment on the video page and you might be the lucky winner in the prize draw for one of these fab freebies!

1st – Amazon Gift Voucher!

2nd – Befouled desk calendar 2017

3rd – Befouled mousemat

Want to know more about ‘Befouled’?

Go HERE

for excerpts and other geeky factoids about the Ordha Universe and its origins…!

THANK YOU
so much for looking in today

may YOUR 2018 be happy,

bright and fulfilling!

❤ ❤ ❤